Some of my thoughts on how the assumption that others share one's own, subjective norms, ideas and beliefs often leads to problems. Everyone of course has certain values and notions of what is important in relationships, jobs, etc, and how to act properly.
Sometimes however you forget that these are merely your own personal standards, and not necessarily shared by or applicable to others. And if they disagree, that doesn't necessarily mean that they're wrong.
Sometimes we think we mean the same thing because we use the same word, like "honesty" or "faithfulness" for example. But those are just words, symbols. Even though they have a dictionary definition, individual people may interpret them quite differently in everyday life. Marriages have failed because the partners didn't talk about what is truly important to them, or exactly what they mean by it.
I think it's extremely important to try to be as clear and honest as possible in a relationship, and to talk about everything. That's the recipe for a happy, fulfilled relationship, and I would wish for more people to have that. Might be too idealistic, but that's just my view. :)
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shooting in dc Thoughts on unspoken rules & other problems in relationships and everyday life | |
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